Volume 3 Chapter 37 Reignited Love
He only came to see her, and he didn't think he would end up talking.
Unexpectedly, he got that chance, and Suisen kept opening her mouth silently. His face was hot.
His heart was racing.
Naturally, his feelings were getting more intense.
He felt like he had to say something, but in his panic, he couldn't respond at all.
While he was confused like that, Alium spoke up first.
"It seems you haven't quit being an adventurer, which is a relief."
"Eh?"
"I heard about a month ago that you got kicked out of your party again. Your bad reputation is spreading even more, and I thought maybe that was why you quit being an adventurer. But since you came to the guild like this, that doesn't seem to be the case, right? So I'm really relieved."
"..."
Hearing those words from Alium left him stunned.
It's true that he had been training a lot lately, so he hadn't been able to show his face at the guild.
But he never expected Alium to worry about him.
He thought of himself as just a bottom-tier adventurer and planned to let Alium get to know him little by little.
To his surprise, it seemed Alium had recognized him, and Suisen felt secretly happy.
However...
(...W-what am I thinking)
Feeling a little pulse again made it even harder for her.
That's right, he had already decided to "give up." There was no hope left for becoming stronger, so he had to completely lock away his feelings for Alium.
So, he stayed silent without responding, and Alium, unaware of this, continued with small talk.
"Have you gotten a bit tougher?"
"Eh?"
"You look like you've really built up your body compared to before. It's always nice to see a novice adventurer growing little by little. I'm really looking forward to what comes next."
──Please stop. I wish you wouldn't talk to me so familiarly. I'm happy that you noticed the small changes, and I'm glad you remembered my things.
He can't help but think like that. He finally made up his mind to give up, and even though he came for a last look, if you treat him so kindly like this...
"Why are you being so nice to someone like me?"
"Hm?"
"You call out to me when I'm alone, and you pick out requests for my sake. Why are you being kind to me? There's no benefit for you in being nice to me..."
To finally gather the resolve to give up, Suisen asked a pathetic question in front of their crush.
They heard that scandalous rumors were spreading in the guild, and it was even a topic among the receptionists.
Why would someone like him, a nuisance in the guild, be treated so kindly? He asked this to make Alium realize again that there was no gain in it for her... but an unexpected answer came back from her.
"Maybe it's because you remind me a little of my 'younger brother'."
"Younger brother...?"
"I had a younger brother who was active as an 'adventurer' about ten years ago. He did something reckless when he was just starting out and lost his life. I can't meet him anymore now."
"..."
Seeing Alium talk with a slightly lonely expression made Suisen feel a wave of guilt.
He hadn't intended to ask about that.
However, at the same time, an unexpected fact was revealed, and Suisen was secretly astonished.
He was surprised to learn that Alium had also been an adventurer.
But considering her abilities, it didn't seem strange; rather, it felt understandable.
Summoner Alium having the same power as a Rank 1 adventurer was likely because she had once been an adventurer herself.
"After that incident with my brother, I quickly changed from being an adventurer to a guild receptionist. I couldn't bear to watch the reckless newcomers like my brother, so I wanted to become a receptionist to watch over those adventurers up close."
Alium glanced at the guild at night, sadly looking at the few remaining novice adventurers.
Then she returned her gaze, her eyes distant as if thinking of her deceased brother.
"You're really a coward, but you have this strange tendency to show off. I thought that was something you and he had in common. You act overly confident in front of everyone, but when you're alone, you probably wear a lonely expression."
"Y-you noticed...?"
"I always watched my brother, who was a lot like you. I can see through your 'mask' easily."
Alium smiled with a slightly proud look.
She wasn't being kind to Suisen out of any sense of gain or loss.
She had seen that Suisen was a man lacking in confidence and was concerned for his showy brother.
She had been watching over him to prevent him from overdoing it, even when he was being ostracized by the guild and trying to act carefree.
Hearing this again made Suisen feel an even greater wall between them.
To Alium, he was still someone to be watched over, not an equal.
"Right. How about we stop by the reception for a bit? We can look for some requests. You seem to have been training your body, so it should be fine to prepare a somewhat difficult request."
Suisen felt a secret pain at Alium's kind offer.
At the same time, he recalled his feelings of resignation and replied.
"...It's fine. Please just leave my matters alone."
"Suisen Pride...?"
"I just not able to get stronger anymore. No matter how hard I try from now on, without a job class, I can't really grow. I've realized I don't have that kind of talent. So please, just leave me alone."
Remembering the days of training with Nurturer Roezé, Suisen was filled with guilt.
Despite having been so devotedly cared for by Roezé, he had hardly changed at all.
The idea of becoming stronger than Alium and successfully confessing felt like a dream.
Moreover, it would be difficult for him to continue his activities as an adventurer in the future.
So, somewhere in his heart, he had been considering the option of 'quitting being an adventurer'.
(...This is fine.)
Originally, Suisen was a timid boy who was bullied in a rural village.
He had a flashy appearance that drew attention, both good and bad.
Additionally, due to his low self-esteem and lack of a job class, he was often teased and pranked by those around him.
To change himself, Suisen became an adventurer against his parents' wishes, hoping to create some kind of lasting honor.
He thought that by doing so, he would gain confidence.
'You're Suisen, the party destroyer, right? I can't have you ruining my party, so go bother someone else.'
'There's no way a guy without a job class can join my party.'
However, he never blossomed as an adventurer and eventually became a nuisance within the guild.
So he wished to be left alone, feeling like he had no talent.
As he bit his lip in secret, tasting his frustration, he was unexpectedly spoken to by Alium.
"I feel talent in you."
"──!?"
"Strength doesn't only refer to the power to defeat monsters. I believe true strength is the 'grit' to keep pursuing strength."
Grit...?
As he tilted his head in confusion, Alium looked straight into his eyes and smiled warmly.
"You say you can't become strong anymore, but deep down, you haven't given up on becoming stronger, have you? I can tell just by looking into your eyes. You are a true strong person overflowing with grit."
Hearing that made his heart skip a beat.
He hadn't given up on becoming strong.
No matter how much he tried to cover it up with words, it seemed he couldn't hide his true feelings.
As he was caught off guard by the truth, Alium continued to watch Suisen's flustered state with a smile.
"I like strong people. Maybe because I openly say that, those who approach me with affection only flaunt their 'strength' as 'power.' So, I decided to duel them and test their true grit."
"A duel...? Was that the reason Ms. Alium was dueling with adventurers?"
"Yeah. However, among the adventurers I defeated, none ever challenged me again. The strong people I'm talking about aren't the weaklings who break down after losing; they're the arrogant ones who accept their weaknesses and still strive to become stronger."
Arrogant ones who accept their weaknesses and still try to get stronger.
It's like struggling desperately without a job class, convincing themselves they have talent...
"So, I like you as a person. At the same time, I sense your talent. You can still become much stronger."
"..."
"And you should know that better than anyone. Sometimes, you might hear bad rumors about yourself, and some adventurers might take them at face value, but I hope you continue being an adventurer and grow stronger. No matter what anyone says, you are... a very valuable existence as an adventurer."
──Ah, I knew it.
He really does like this person.
He came here intending to give up, but after talking again, he realized he can't lie about his feelings.
This person still believes he can get stronger.
She says he's a valuable existence without being swayed by the rumors around him.
"By the way, you finally decided to take off your mask and talk to me. I don't know what changed in your heart, but I'm really happy about it."
Seeing Alium's gentle smile, Suisen felt a burning passion.
He wanted to convey his feelings of love to this person right now.
Regardless of whether the confession would succeed or not, he just wanted to unleash this fiery emotion onto them.
Overflowing feelings surged from his heart, and before he knew it, Suisen found himself speaking.
"Ah, Ms. Alium...!"
"Hm? Is something wrong?"
"Ah, um, that..."
But Suisen immediately shut his mouth and fell silent.
No, this is bad.
He can't express these feelings.
If he confesses his feelings here, the fans of Sianna Navis will figure out how he feels about Alium.
If that happens, Alium might end up in danger, just like Roezé and Cosmos did.
So he has to suppress these feelings no matter what.
Even though his passion has surged again, he's suffering because he has to hold it back when Alium placed a hand on his shoulder.
"Are you feeling unwell? If you want, I can go with you to the guild's infirmary..."
"I-I'm sorry, Ms. Alium!"
Suisen brushed Alium's hand away and ran off from the spot.
He dashed out of the guild and ran recklessly through the night streets.
He likes Alium.
But he's not allowed to express this feeling.
And he can't help but hate and feel pathetic about himself for creating such a situation.
(...I should give up)
He's decided to stop going to that guild.
Even though Alium encouraged him, if he stays there any longer, he won't be able to hold back his feelings.
So this must be the right choice.
As he ran down the street without realizing it, Suisen found himself in a dimly lit alley.
Without noticing that, he turned into a side street, still caught up in his momentum.
Just then──.
"Aaah!"
A small woman came out from the alley, and they almost collided.
Suisen narrowly avoided her and snapped back to reality, apologizing to the woman.
"I-I'm sorry. I didn't mean to startle you. Are you hurt...?"
As he started to speak, Suisen suddenly lost his words.
Because the woman there was...
"Suisen, is that you...?"
With her purple curly hair and elegant appearance, it was Sianna Navis.
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