Volume 12 Chapter 12 Family Love
As I regained my composure, I attacked Sur, shouting.
"You kill your family because of your pathetic whining! You're so annoying, Stu――――――pid!"
"!?"
Did my words stir up Sur's anxiety? Sur deflected my sword, but the sword's tip was clearly shaking.
"W-what are you talking about, Wade-sama...!?"
"Oh, you're still whining like a kid? If this is how you're going to act, then you're even weaker than before! You're like a brat who can't even fight properly!"
"!?"
I pulled back my sword, spun around, and struck again. Sur was still shaken, unable to make a swift move like before and only managed to defend.
"W-what are you saying? What do you mean?"
"You're still complaining about your parents even though you killed them! You think you're some kind of victim? You're the one who did it, aren't you? Then stop making excuses!"
"―――――!"
Sur finally composed himself after understanding the gist of my words.
"You think you understand anything? You, who have never experienced being killed by your parents, what do you know?"
"Hah!? I've experienced it many times! You're the one who's always playing the victim, so stop acting like you're some kind of 'understander'!"
"!?!?!?!?!?!?"
My retort was apparently beyond Sur's expectations, and he stared at me with a mixture of surprise and anger, our swords clashing.
Sur realized his disadvantage and took a large step back, repositioning his flame sword. Then, he took a sharp breath and launched a swift attack at me.
I crushed it. I've already grasped the rhythm. I can even keep up with the crazy speed. I can take on Sur head-on!
"What the... how did you get so strong...?!"
"You're fighting someone who's equal or slightly stronger than you! I can adjust to this level quickly, don't underestimate me!"
"Huh? Adjust? No, no, no, the Wade-sama I've seen until now hasn't been using their full power...?!"
"If you don't surpass yourself, you'll just stagnate even if you grow stronger! Besides, I'm the one talking here! You're the one who's being conceited, Sur!"
As we clashed, we yelled at each other. Sur's face twisted in anguish as he desperately clashed with me.
"My business is my own! Leave me alone! Wade-sama's lectures are pointless anyway!"
"Lectures?! Don't be ridiculous! That's why I said we're fighting! I'll crush the parts of you that get on my nerves, and you'll do the same to me, that's all this fight is about!"
I knocked Sur's sword upwards and hit the incoming meteorite with Durandal like a baseball. The meteorite lodged itself in Sur's torso, finally landing a direct hit on him.
"Ugh... this is...!"
Sur's sword accelerated even further. I hadn't caught up yet, so I muttered "damn" and evaporated once.
I revived using the Anahata Chakra, but it was a close call. I got hit directly, so I don't have any spare lives left. I can't let my guard down.
In this precarious situation, Sur came at me with a relentless onslaught.
"Wade-sama, you're so arrogant! You're flaunting your overwhelming strength, saying you can easily overcome the problems I've struggled with! You have no idea how tough it is for me!"
"What's with 'overcoming'?! You killed your own parent, didn't you?! It's not like you overcame it after that! Why are you making that 'it's still tough' face, huh?!"
"I haven't overcome it yet, that's why!"
As Sur swung his sword at me, I quickly dodged, my eyes getting used to his movements. Philia let out a surprised voice, "Whoa, you finally dodged, Wade-chan!" Ugh, that guy's so noisy.
"I thought that if I killed my parent, I could break free from the curse! But I couldn't! Even after killing them, the curse only got stronger, and I'm still bound by it!"
Sur cried while gritting her teeth, swinging her sword wildly.
"Why?! Why do I still have to be haunted by my parent's shadow after killing them one-sidedly and spitting on them?! I'm already stronger than my parent! I devoured them, took their power, and yet... why...?!"
He tried to crush me, swinging his sword down at me like a mole, but I dodged each time. The ground cracked and carbonized from the force of his sword.
But I didn't let it faze me, and I yelled at Sur instead.
"You don't get it, do you, idiot?!"
"――――What did you just say?!"
Sur's face contorted in rage as he cried, his anger at 100% as he tried to strike me down.
But I blocked his sword and counterattacked, striking his empty, hollow body with a single blow.
"Gaahhh!"
"Sur! You don't understand anything! Why are you still attached to your useless father?! You should've killed him already, but why can't you do it?! You don't understand anything!"
"Bu-but, why, why...! Teach me, please...! Why can't I escape from Father...?"
Again, I parried the flames-imbued sword with Durandal.
"It's simple, isn't it? You loved your father, that's why!"
"Ha――――――."
I shouted.
Then, Sur's expression changed, and he said,
"I'll kill you!"
"Hahaha, Sur's gone crazy! Sorry, that's just too funny!"
"I'll kill you!"
Sur charged at me with a demonic expression. I tried to defend, but his power was too strong, and I got blown away. Whoa, I overdid it this time! This is bad, this is bad!
"Hahahahahaha! Good one, Sur! This is getting to be a fun fight!"
"Wade-sama! I'll definitely kill you!"
"Haha, Sur, who was so careful before, has become this reckless! It's too funny! I should've called everyone!"
"Die! Kill you!"
Sur was in a frenzy. I enjoyed his increased attack power and retorted,
"Hey Sur! Why are you getting so worked up? I'll tell you! It's because you got hit where it hurts!"
"What are you talking about?! I've hated Father since a long time ago! I despised him! I couldn't forgive him no matter what! That's why... and you're saying I love him...?!"
I deflected Sur's sword and shouted.
"That's it! That's what you don't understand, Sur! 'If you loved him, you wouldn't be able to forgive him', right?!?"
"Hu...?"
I'm trying to hit that gap. But Sur has gotten used to my pattern of creating an opening with a feint and then striking, so he's able to defend against it.
"What's with you mixing up love, personal preferences, hatred, and forgiveness? It's like you're talking about different dimensions! Why are you confusing everything?"
"Huh, I don't understand what you're saying! Stop saying ridiculous things!"
"I'm telling my story, okay?"
I use gravity magic to jump up and quickly pass over Sur's head. Sur loses sight of me for a moment, and I take advantage of the delay to strike. He tries to defend himself with his sword, but it's too late.
"My parents were trash too! They're still alive, and they're right there! I got angry just thinking about it, so I'll deal with them later!"
"Liar!"
My old man, who's completely untrustworthy, shouts out in response. What a ridiculous old man, it's laughable.
"I also fought with that stupid old man of mine! We went at each other's throats until we were on the brink of killing each other! Honestly, I was prepared to kill him!"
"Are you talking about how Wade-sama was lucky? What do you want me to do about it?"
"That's not the point! I'm telling the truth, okay? Back then, I didn't care if I killed my old man or not. Either way was fine with me!"
"Huh?"
"Eh?"
Sur looks at me like he doesn't understand what I'm saying. My old man is also getting flustered at the mention of me killing him.
"Do you get it? You don't get it, do you? You're still whining, Sur-kun (laughs), after pulling off a parent-killing stunt?"
"Stop talking down to me like that! Yes! I don't understand your way of thinking at all! It's like you're a deviant or something, and I don't get it even a little bit!"
"Well, I'll tell you then! The reason I didn't have to kill my old man back then... It's because―――."
I swung Durandal down from above Sur's head. Sur defended himself with his flame sword, receiving Durandal's attack.
I let out a shout.
"―――I'd already finished off my parent back then! I was done with the parental killing!"
"... Wait, did I get killed?"
"Shut up, old man! Don't just throw in some lame tea ceremony jokes!"
"Whoa, whoa, whoa! You're not gonna cut me down! If the illusion disperses, I won't be able to return to normal!"
"Sorry!"
I realized I was getting a bit too excited, so I calmed down a bit and landed on the ground.
Meanwhile, Sur looked at me with a confused expression, not understanding what was going on. He didn't even swing his flame sword, just staring at me with a bewildered face.
"... What's going on? You didn't kill anyone, but you're saying you finished the parental killing...? What is this parental killing thing? What do you mean by that?"
"That's right, it's about surpassing your parent. You don't need to actually kill your parent to do it. You just need to show them you've surpassed them, and make them say 'I give up.'."
"I don't get it... That's not it, is it? If that's all it is, then I could do it too..."
"You might say that, but the most important part of parental killing is something you're lacking, Sur."
"... What's that?"
I tapped my chest.
"It's the awareness of 'loving your parent.'."
".........?"
"You're looking at me like you have no idea what I'm talking about."
Sur kept staring at me, his eyes fixed on me. I thought our fight was over and our conversation had begun.
So I shouldered Durandal and continued speaking.
"I hate my crappy old man. I loathed him. Even now, it's not like that, but at the time of the parental murder, I really loathed him. And even now, I still haven't forgiven him."
"Wh――."
"You think you'll be forgiven for your whole life? I'll never forgive you, so it's okay."
When I glared at him, my old man looked down with a pathetic face.
"But I love my old man. That's why I didn't need to kill him. If I had needed to kill him, I would've done it while hating him, without forgiving him, and still loving him. So no matter what, I won't be like you, dragging my parents around."
"...I don't get it. You're saying that loving and hating are separate, but I don't get it."
"Hey, are you still fighting with your father, and do you still have some words stuck in your chest or something?"
When I said that, Sur's face looked like he was about to cry, and he forced out some words.
"...In my family, I was the only one who didn't feel loved."
"Ugh, what a crappy parent."
"...Wade-sama."
Sur glared at me, but I'm sure that was just a reflex. Sur probably didn't even realize that he was glaring at me right now.
So I laughed.
"What's with you, Sur? Are you pissed that I'm making fun of your crappy father?"
"H-h, n-no, it's not that..."
"I think loving someone is just an extension of liking them, but it's complicated and frustrating, you know? I get it."
Sur gripped his flaming sword tightly and stood up straight. I added more words to Sur.
"Parents are supposed to love their kids, right? But there are a lot of stories where that's not the case. There are a lot of stories about parents killing their kids, too. But the ones who kill their parents are always so twisted."
"...I..."
"I was told I didn't love them, and yet I'm suffering like this. I should be hating them, but I'm getting ridiculed by some idiot who doesn't know a thing. This is love. Sur hates her father, hates him, but loves him too."
"...Wade-sama..."
Sur starts crying like a kid, sniffling and asking me.
"What was I supposed to do...? I didn't have a choice but to kill my father back then. But I did it..."
It's not just my father, Sur continues.
"I killed my brother, my sister. My sister even said she loved me...! I was too caught up in my own despair to respond, and now I can't take back my sin..."
To Sur's pitiful words, I respond.
"Isn't it okay to have killed your parents, anyway? They didn't love you back, and they even tried to kill you? Killing them was the right thing to do."
"...!? But, um, well..."
"As for your sister, I don't have anything to say. I don't know anything about your sister. I don't know what she meant when she said that. But, Sur, I think you'll always regret it."
The past can't be changed. Now that he's calm, he can't change his past choices. Nobody can. We can only live in the present.
But on the other hand, we can change things right now, in this moment.
"That's why I'm telling you, Sur, I'm only talking about your story."
I look straight at Sur.
"Sur, you loved your family. But you hated them, and you had no choice but to kill them. But you're suffering because you're lying to yourself, saying you didn't love your parents."
"..."
"So, first, you'll acknowledge it. Sur loved his family. Not just your parents, but your siblings too――the whole family. But, you had no choice but to kill them. You'll acknowledge that, even if it's hard to accept, and still love them."
"That's right," I continue.
"It's the same for you, isn't it? Even in a normal family, we're all born from our parents. Brothers and sisters are the same, living in the same household."
"That's right."
"If you spit on your family, it'll come back to haunt you. If you don't acknowledge that you love them――you can't love yourself either."
"...Even if it's hard to accept, I'll acknowledge that I love them..."
Sur is rethinking my words. As I watch him, I think.
That's right. This is a story about Sur's way of thinking, not about his relationship with his parents. It's about how he thinks.
There are families that bring harm just by being nearby. It's not that you should love them because they're family, or that you're related to them. That's different.
Love, especially the love children have for their parents, is close to obsession. It's an instinctual thing, and if it's not fulfilled, it warps us as living beings.
But even so, we love our families. Even if we end up killing each other, we love them.
Acknowledging that is enough to break the curse. Because we know we love them.
Even if we're angry, even if we hate, we still love them, and that's why we can't help but forgive ourselves.
Because no matter how hard we try, we can't separate ourselves from our families.
"...Wade-sama."
Sur wipes away his tears with his arm. Then, with a calm gaze, he looks at me.
"I don't fully understand what you're saying. I'm still not convinced. But somehow, I feel like I've gotten a hint to dispel this uncertainty."
"That's great."
"...I've really come to resent you. So, I'll say it, understanding that my power is no match for yours."
Sur, or Surtr, readies his flaming sword again and says:
"Wade-sama, I want to fight you seriously."
"Ah, me too. Let's settle this once and for all, Sur."
I respond by readjusting my Durandal towards Surtr.
The air was quiet. In the midst of silence, the tension continued to build. It was a clash between a human and a giant, but I didn't feel like Surtr was as enormous as he had been before.
The opponent's breathing was audible, and the stillness was palpable. The air was electric with tension, created by 2 opponents evenly matched in power.
I couldn't help but smile. This was my favorite thing. Everything I loved was right here.
"―――Haah!"
Surtr moves, swinging his flaming sword with an incredibly sharp blade that no one else could react to.
I just laughed and charged forward.
Surtr's arms fell.
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