Chapter 145 Two Resolves
――To head towards Platonovena, our destination, we need to ride horse-drawn carriages and take a ship from the harbor.
On the way to the harbor, we stopped by a town where Marta, who had just found out she'd be taking a ship, burst into tears and refused to budge. It seems she's afraid of the sea.
"That iron lump is gonna sink for sure! No way! I'll die!"
"Don't be ridiculous! You didn't know how to get to Platonovena?"
"Marta, stop causing a scene and bothering the people around us."
Marta wailed, Julius scolded her with a stern face, and Lukas tried to calm her down while keeping an eye on the surroundings.
This has been going on for a while now. Arnold was exasperated, and Diona had already gone ahead to the inn with Reinhardt-san, using the "cauldron" to communicate with them.
I, on the other hand, was watching the 3 of them from a distance, smiling wistfully. Then, I heard a voice calling out from behind.
"Hey, let's go ahead, shall we?"
I turned around to see Vake grinning at Marta like an idiot.
I ran up to him and walked beside him, my back to his broad shoulders.
"Are you going to the inn ahead of us?"
"I'd like to take a stroll around this town since we're here. Is that okay?"
I nodded, looking up at his profile. ――It was a mistake to stand on his right side. His right eye, which had suffered a large injury, was staring straight at me. Although he had worn an eye patch for a while due to his injury and treatment, he had taken it off when we set out on our journey, revealing the wound.
Even now, seeing Vake's injured right eye makes my heart skip a beat.
"...Does it bother you?"
Vake pointed to his right eye, as if he had noticed me staring at it unconsciously.
"N, no I-I mean, yes..."
I reflexively shook my head, but Vake's gaze didn't waver, and I ended up nodding in resignation.
Vake flashed a bright smile, showing off his teeth, and puffed out his chest. Then,
"That's cool, right? It's an honorable scar from defending the royal capital."
He said the same thing he had mentioned before, about being the "Last Brave".
So, even in the game, Vake didn't hide the fact that his eye injury was an honorable wound. When I played the game, I thought he was really cool and I loved him――
Even if it was just a phrase, since he was smiling like that, it would be rude for me to keep bringing it up. I nodded deeply.
"Yes, you're really cool!"
When I said that, Vake's smile deepened even more. In response to his dazzling smile, I also raised the corners of my mouth.
We chatted casually while walking aimlessly, and before I knew it, we had entered a deserted alley.
Vake stopped in his tracks and leaned against the wall, asking me.
"How's the journey, young lady?"
"I think it's been a series of unfamiliar experiences, and I've caused everyone a lot of trouble..."
I forced a laugh. Then, I heard a deep breath being taken from the side.
――Vake's reaction, like he was taking a deep breath, made my heart skip a beat. What was he going to say?
"I'm against you coming on this journey, young lady. Even now, I can't agree to it."
The words were spoken in a lower tone than usual. While Vake looked apologetic, avoiding eye contact, I nodded calmly.
"I think that's true. I mean, I can't fight, so I'd just be a burden."
My response made Vake fall silent for a moment.
When I thought about it, he had indeed warned me about the dangers of coming on this journey when I decided to join. As the leader of the Knight Order, he knew more than anyone the risks of a weak person joining the journey.
I looked at Vake. He pushed himself away from the wall and turned to face me.
The carefree smile he had until a moment ago was gone, replaced by a serious expression as he looked down at me. I also turned to face him squarely, waiting for his next words.
"...I hate it when you say you're a burden, but yeah, you're aware of your position and the situation. That's why it's painful for me to say this, but..."
There, he paused once. And then――he looked me in the eye and said.
"Resolve to be discarded, and make up your mind about it."
――Being discarded, resolve.
I couldn't react immediately to the dropped words.
As a result, I ended up staying silent, and Vake continued in a slow, gentle tone, as if he was trying to make me listen.
"Lukas and Diona would definitely try to protect you no matter what, yeah. I don't think that's a bad thing. Having someone you want to protect gives you absolute strength. In fact, Lukas's power source is his desire to protect his hometown people."
I nodded slightly, without any pretenses, thinking "that's definitely true".
Lukas and Diona are really kind. They're the kind of people who would sacrifice themselves to protect me if I'm in a pinch. That thought is both happy and painful.
"Arnold's the same. Sister, friends, you... ah, once you've taken them into your heart, you'll risk your life to protect them."
That's also imaginable. In fact, Lukas got hurt protecting me, and Arnold has a personality that makes him take on extra burdens because he thinks he's superior.
I couldn't look away from Vake's green eyes.
"But if even one of those 3 is missing, it's a huge problem in terms of battle power. Especially Lukas ―― if he dies, this world will be ruled by the demon king."
The top priority is the Hero's life. I thought I understood that.
――Resolve to be discarded.
His words were still echoing in my ears.
"If the worst happens, I'll do my best to prevent it. As an individual, I think you're a great person, and I respect how you always try to do what you can. You're also an indispensable existence for obtaining the holy sword."
You're an existence permitted by the water spirit. Thinking that, I also realize I'm an indispensable existence.
However――if something really bad happens to me, even if the water spirit is there, and someone else can get permission again, it might be possible to obtain the holy sword. In fact, other spirits have given permission to the Hero. It's not an impossible story.
The top priority should be Lukas. Next, the friends who have the power to defeat the demon king. So, my priority ranking is――at the very bottom.
"But if... by some chance, it comes down to choosing between Lukas and your life――I'll undoubtedly choose Lukas."
Vake's voice was firm, like he was trying to suppress his emotions.
Looking up at Vake's pained expression, I think he doesn't really want to say this to me. But someone has to, and kind Vake has taken on the role of the bad guy, no doubt.
Vake's words slowly sank in, and I nodded in acceptance.
"This kind of thing, it's not something the commander of the Knight Order should be saying. Originally, we should be protecting girls like you. I'm unfit to be the Knight Order's commander."
Vake's voice trembled as he spoke, like he was confessing his sins.
I think Vake hasn't said anything wrong, and in reality, we don't know what's going to happen from now on. We should decide our priorities clearly, just in case.
Even if the worst happens, Vake will search for a way to help me until the very end. But there are things in this world that just can't be helped. When it becomes impossible――I'll have to make my resolve.
It's okay. I've made my resolve. I also want to protect this world, the important people living in it. For that, even if I have to sacrifice my honor, I won't regret it.
I took a step closer to Vake, who was hanging his head, and looked up at him with a smile.
"Thank you."
Vake's face lit up like a spring, and his expression, which was somehow pitiful for the oldest member of our party, made me burst out laughing.
"Lukas, Arnold-san, Diona, Marta, Julius, everyone... they're all kind, so I think they wouldn't be able to say something like that to me."
Vake and the other members are far apart in age. Those young guys, still in their late teens, would surely hesitate to choose to abandon me. Moreover, they couldn't possibly tell me to my face that they might do so.
That's why I was grateful when Vake spoke up. With the powerful monster Platonovena ahead, I was able to make up my mind.
"Thanks for telling me."
This was half a bluff. It was a proud declaration, coming from a desire to be a good person and not be a burden, and not wanting to be hated.
In reality, when the time came, I might abandon my resolve and beg for help. I might cry and scream, and hate those who abandoned me. But they couldn't stop in their tracks because of that.
I looked up at Vake, who was gazing at me with a stunned expression, and made one "request."
"I've made up my mind, but if something unexpected happens, I might beg for help. If that happens, please abandon me. If Lukas and the others turn back, please give them a push."
Only Vake could do that.
I knew it was a cruel request, but I asked Vake anyway. He let out a sigh that was neither a laugh nor a cry, and looked up at the sky.
"...It's better if you hate me, if you scold me. That would be more comforting."
I forced a smile at his muttered words.
It would be better if I cried here and now, and Vake could play the role of the hated one. But I knew Vake was too kind for that.
I knew how many times he had helped me in the "Last Brave" and in this world.
If something unexpected happened and Vake chose to abandon me, he would be the one who would hurt the most. He would regret it for the rest of his life, and carry the pain of that day with him.
Vake clenched his fist tightly and knelt down on the spot. Then, he looked up at my face and held out his right hand.
I thought he was asking for a handshake, so I held out my right hand too. The moment our large, firm hands clasped, a low, determined voice resonated in my ears.
"I promise, Laura Ampère-dono."
――Not as a powerless girl, but as an equal woman, I felt like I could face Vake.
We exchanged handshakes and smiled at each other.
"I'll be counting on you from now on, young lady."
From now on. It seemed like Vake's sorrowful wish was embedded in those words.
Yeah, I want to travel with them from now on too. If I can, I want to be of help. I don't want to leave Vake with regrets.
I've made up my mind to not be abandoned, and――one more thing. I've also made another resolution.
I've resolved to survive. No matter what enemy I face, I won't give up, no matter how pathetic I become, I'll survive.
Right now, the water spirit sleeping in my bag and the crossbow Julius gave me are all I need. I'll do everything I can. I'll prepare for everything.
I slapped my cheek to psyche myself up. My resolution is set.
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